This week’s news briefs: Because Fruit of the Loom really cares about campus events

Posted By Horizon Staff March 28th, 2013 in Capstone : 0 COMMENTS

Eric Zuidema
A Hanes guy &
Jonny Wahl
Only holiday boxers


Do you hear the people sing?

A plea has been issued to the student body to sing more quietly during chapel worship. It is very difficult to hear the band over the singing of students.

The spiritual health of the Westmont community is in jeopardy as long as the cacophonous voices of the student body are in competition with the instruments. Several alternative solutions have been offered.

One obvious solution involves the chapel band adding three more acoustic guitars, but this would require finding three more Westmont students who play guitar, which might take a while.

Please help the chapel band save time and face by burying your head in a scarf or ascot whilst singing.


Surveys plaguing students

The entire campus rushes to log out of their Westmont email accounts (usually having to hit “sign out” twice in order to actually be signed out) this week, as hundreds of all-student emails containing surveys for class projects hit inboxes everywhere. There seems to be no escape from the pleas of “I need your help with my anthropology project” and “You’ve been hand-picked for the special honor of completing an important, brief, entertaining survey on a topic that is very important to everyone ever” and “If you give a few minutes of your time, I’ll give you a pat on the back if you show up to my room, but that’s not all; the next time I save a Word document, I’ll name it after you” and “please please please pLeAsE” and “I need to know what events led to the French Revolution for a study on historical stuff.” Don’t give in; we hear those links contain viruses that post, “I love my mom,” on your Facebook account.


Follow @thatcapstone

The Capstone is on Twitter, and it’s a big deal. Imagine those times when you’re sitting in chapel, and the speaker totally looks like Rowan Atkinson, but you can’t say anything because getting your phone taken away is, at our age, pretty embarrassing.

Let The Capstone say what’s on your mind! We never get in trouble for anything, despite trying our best to. Of course, checking your phone for tweets during chapel runs the same risk as posting them…but it’s different somehow. We’ll get back to you on that one.

See something amusing on campus? Mention @thatcapstone in your tweet (and email just to be safe). The more times people report seeing Joe Sidebotham sprinting to class or Enoch Matsumura practicing his sexy sax man impersonation, the more likely we are to put together an entire article on it.

Plus, we’ll live tweet events! For example, one of our writers was sitting in front of Gayle Beebe at Spring Sing; a live tweet sesh would have looked roughly similar to this (although I’m stacking them oldest to newest, rather than Twitter’s newest to oldest). 

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